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Dating sikh females

It takes no genius to realise that there is a great paradox between the Sikh philosophy and Punjabi culture.

There is so much discrimination in Punjabi culture that it pains me that these Punjabi’s proudly call themselves Sikhs whilst delving in such hypocrisy.

I always knew I craved more attention from my parents, and, as a teacher, I notice most kids in big families have attention seeking tendencies.

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I am not saying that it is wrong to be a mummy’s boy, only to become conscious of the discrimination that still lies in our society today, and why I feel (girls like myself) thought they would never marry a Sikh PUNJABI boy.” With each comment that Sundeep made I realised that he was brought up with those expectations of females and his mother (as most Punjabi mothers do) indoctrinating his mind with that the female should be ‘serving’ the male.And by ‘indoctrinating’ I do not mean this in a malicious or conniving way, simply that women of our mothers and grandmothers generation’s job role was to be a housewife, therefore that is what they know to be true.When we were dating, we would begin cooking together in his kitchen, soon after several times cooking together, I would notice that Sundeep would disappear upstairs.He would, makes some calls, listen or play some music and chill.My brain froze as these were the conflicts I knew came with the understanding of marrying a Sikh boy: 1) Most Sikh boys are Punjabi, 2) Punjabi boys from a young age are indoctrinated with the ideals that they are the superior gender, 3) They have expectations of the ‘wife’ serving them, 4) They have been spoon-fed by their mothers, 5) They do not know how to cook or wash clothes (many do not have the drive to learn either), 6) Due to mothers need to give them everything: they have not nurtured their life skills, 7) Most Punjabi boys don’t go further than Bhangra, Rn B, Hip Pop and Pop and frown upon those that do not conform to ‘Punjabi’ conventions (I love a variety of music genres, mainly alternative) 8) They either tend to drink alcohol or completely condemn alcohol, 9) Or the guy is so in denial about being Punjabi that he scoffs at any association with Punjabi culture.I remember when I began dating my husband, he made some 'jokey' comments which made me think, “gosh, I’m NEVER going to marry this typical Punjabi guy.” Here are some comments; a) “So when you become a housewife…” b) “When we have 5 children…” c) “When you’ll prepare my lunches…” With comment a) my reaction was, “So when did you ask me whether I wanted to become a housewife?It takes the spirit of our Gurus to confront the things that are the most uncomfortable.The simple truth is, that as women alone we cannot change gender inequality.Especially when both the mother and father are working people.With comment b) I simply responded “Good luck finding a wife that will pop out 5 children!

987 comments

  1. It takes no genius to realise that there is a great paradox between the Sikh philosophy. Why do Sikh girls struggle to marry Punjabi. males AND females.

  2. Date Masi, fun, casual, activity based singles events for Hindu and Sikh professional in the UK. 50/50 split male to female at every event.

  3. Responses to “The trials and tribulations of dating while Sikh. The majority of SIkh females have haircuts and very few are expected to keep their hair and.

  4. Sikhs control women by. The first is about some Sikhs forming an alliance with the English Defence League over the alleged sexual assault of a Sikh woman by a.

  5. I'd like for Sikh females to also understand that conforming to. It sucks when one is in high school and all of the Sikh girls are dating only Sikh guys who have.

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