Let me tell you about second place: This is where close members of his family reside.
This is the place he reserves for family or as-good-as family.
You and your girlfriend should talk seriously about this next step.
If possible, consider sleeping over when her children are not at home or are elsewhere.
Dating someone who has a child from a previous marriage introduces many complicated issues.
Many children of divorced parents still have a lingering hope that their parents will reunite, and you are a sign that her parent’s relationship really is over.
You may consider bringing the child a small gift to show your good will and sincere interest in him, such as baseball cards for a collector or new crayons for an aspiring artist.
Don’t bring anything extravagant, which he may perceive as an effort to buy his affection.
Generally, younger children are more accepting of new relationships. This age is just beginning to understand sexuality, and often preteens have trouble dealing with their own sexuality, let alone the idea that their parents are sexual beings, too.
Although the child at first may refuse to bond with you, over time (maybe even over a year), you can build a relationship.