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20 year old girl dating 42 yr old man

The problem is that – for the most part – these fears are .

It rapidly becomes a case of self-fulfilling prophecy; they believe that there is something shameful and wrong about being a virgin at such an “advanced” age and so it bleeds into other aspects of their lives.

Because of all of the importance placed on the concept of virginity, people are convinced that having passed some arbitrary cut-off point that they have rendered themselves utterly unfuckable and have somehow missed on a critical aspect of growing up.

In fact, you could reasonably equate the two; more often than not, you wait for too damn long for a thrill that’s over in under 3 minutes and half the time you’re wondering what the big deal was.

The fear of reaching is who is a virgin past a certain point – generally as soon as puberty hits, if we’re honest about it – is convinced that they’re on the cusp of reaching some nebulous “point of no return”.

That deadline – the idea we have to lose our virginity by X date or remain forever unfuckable – tends to vary; we tend to put undue importance on arbitrary dates because they carry totemic significance for us.

Some may become bitter and resentful, feeling as though they’re being cheated of something that they’re rightfully “owed”.

Others will have their pre-existing approach anxiety ramped up to near pathological levels, leaving them with anxiety attacks and a crippling shyness around people they’re attracted to.

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